Sunday, May 07, 2006
So I've completed the first week on my first clinical rotation. I'm on orthopedic surgery, which is totally fun and totally exhausting. I find in my spare time it's actually enjoyable to run errands like paying bills and doing laundry. But despite the 16-hours days, the stuff grows on you. Now I'm worried that when I get to the more "laid-back" rotations with 2-hour lunches and 9-4 days, I'll be climbing the walls bored off my ass.
Anyway, here is
An Abbreviated List of Things I've Learned
During My First Week of Clinics
I prefer hard-ass teachers to sticky-sweet ones. I'd rather be told that I suck when I really don't (and of course when I do) than be told that I'm totally awesome when I know I'm not. But, of course, When we really do rock it’s nice to have that acknowledged. . .
Saws and drills and nails and screws ARE totally cool, especially when used in bones! And there are all different types of bone screws, just like there are different screws for drywall, wood and metal
- The surgery residents we have now (Eshelman and Rawson) ARE very good at teaching.
- My last name, although only five letters long, is very confusing to pronounce. A lot of people assume it's "Lah-BOCK" and not "LAY-back." I'm really not used to hear my name over the intercom in French.
- When I am tired and hungry at the end of a long day, only to find that the long day is not over,
I will break these rules: no eating after 9 p.m., "I can't afford to eat or order out" and "I was planning on eating healthy this week." Although I have been sticking pretty well to the no caffeine (or at least minimal caffeine) rule.
- Dr. Eshelman and I have similar tastes in music. 80s arena rock is good accompaniment to spinal surgery, light rock is not. Monster ballads are acceptable, diva ballads are not.
- And Dr. Eshelman was the bat boy in
Bull Durham who read the message to Kevin Costner, not the one who ran the messages back and forth. Do you still want his autograph, Gregg?
- If you look long enough into his eyes, you can fall in love with Harley the obese 180-pound Newfoundland with the nose the size of a tennis ball and paws the size of my hands, even though he pees and drools on when you have to break your back dragging his fat furry ass outside three times a day because he can't use his back legs (torn ACLs on both legs) very well.
- I have a platonic crush on
Dr. Griffon. She's got a totally cool accent and I think her rounds (medical rounds, that is) are the bomb.
- There's not point in getting annoyed or offended by stupid little things people say and do, because you will probably say or do something equally or more annoying within the next five minutes--we all do and say stupid shit when we are tired, frustrated, or stressed.
- Whoever created the VetStar software should be dragged into the street and tarred and feathered.
- Jacob is a true pal. He didn't have any patients and wasn't required to come in, but after a 70-hour plus week came in on 7 a.m. on Saturday anyway, expressly to help me walk Harley. I could tell he totally wanted to sleep in, but he came in because he knew I'd have trouble with Harley all by my lonesome. Thanks, Jacob.
- It's imperative to keep at least four snack bars handy (my favorites include Bumble bars, Lemon or Apricot Cliff bars and nut and fruit bars) in you lab coat pockets each day when you're on any small animal surgical rotation.
- When on any small animal surgical rotation, never pass up an opportunity to rest your feet, relieve yourself, or take a bite of your Bumble bar. You don't know when the next opportunity will arise--the 3-hour surgery you planned for may easily become a 9-hour surgery.
- All you folks on rotations with 2-hour lunches and 7-hour workdays are total strokes. They're not "easing you into it," they're training you to be weak!
